The Ethics of Tipping

I have a problem with the whole "something for nothing" attitude that a lot of people have these days. I have an even bigger problem, however, with people who insist that they ought to be paid extra for substandard service.

Don't get me wrong. I don't have a problem with tipping. I tip what I can, when I can, and when I believe it's due. This, from what I've seen, means two things to most people. 1), I'm in a minority. 2), I'm a tight-fisted meanie who should be more generous with money before karma bites me in the butt and I end up broke and starving on the streets.

In the past, I had the opportunity to talk online to some people that worked in restaurants. They complained that a recent customer had only given them a $5 tip on a $50 meal. This was bad form, they said. A customer should always tip at least 15%, they insisted.

One person in the discussion disagreed. They said that they tipped depending on the level of service they received. They tipped 20% for excellent service, 15% for average service, and 10% for bad service.

I seem to recall rereading that line a few times, unable to believe that someone would willingly and cheerfully pay extra money for bad service.

Again, though, I seem to be in the minority where this is concerned. I will tip for good service. I will tip if the server smiles at me and is cheerful, even if my order is wrong and cold and needs to be sent back to the kitchen. But I won't tip the server if they frown and grump at me that I ought to be satisfied with what I get even if it's not what I ordered. I won't tip if the food is cold because the server stood talking to their friend for 10 minutes about some cute boy or girl they met the night before. They have a paycheque for a reason, and I'm not going to give them more of my money as a reward for giving bad service.

Things are different in America than in Canada, I hear. In America, I've heard that servers is most restaurants get paid below minimum wage, as the employers expect them to make up the rest in tips. This is undoubtedly the driving force behind people wanting their customers to shell out a little extra cash when they leave. However, I don't consider this a valid excuse, as I'm also aware of the fact that by law, if a server does not make enough in tips to meet the equivalent amount in minimum wage, their employer is obliged to pay them the remainder. This means that no matter what, they will make minimum wage on their shifts no matter how many or few tips their receive.

Working for only minimum wage isn't fun. I've done it more than I care to admit, when I needed a job and the only places that were hiring were piddly places that paid as little as they could legally get away with. But I also did expect people to pay me more money, on top of my paycheque, if I gave them substandard service.

The mentality behind that just baffles me. Tips are supposed to be rewards, a monetary thanks for going above and beyond and making an experience enjoyable. But now it seems that people can get away with being subpar and still make extra money. I wouldn't expect it. Heck, in the jobs that I've had where my raise is dependant on meeting certain statistic goals, I don't even get annoyed when, if I come in below the bar, I don't get my raise the way others do. I didn't do what I was supposed to do, so I don't deserve my reward. Simple as that.

But when I apply this to giving money to other people, I suddenly become the bad guy. I get told I have bad ethics, I'm too stingy, I shouldn't eat at restaurants if I don't have enough money to tip a certain amount every time.

As far as I'm concerned, people shouldn't expect extra. A lot of people act as though getting that tip is their right, that as soon as they step out among the tables and start taking orders that they should be guaranteed to make additional money. It isn't a right. It's extra, a bonus, a reward, and personally, I think it ought to be treated as such.

Am I wrong in thinking this way? Is it actually very stingy of me to expect that people need to do more in order to get more? Or should people stop expecting what they don't deserve and instead try to earn their bonuses by doing extra themselves?